Connecting moms in Polk County, Fla.
Should parents vacation without the kids? I'd like to know your thoughts on this and if you've ever taken the plunge for a getaway without the kids.
Maybe you stay away with friends or your honey without the kids? If so, do you feel guilt or do you take the time to truly appreciate your time away from it all? Do you prefer to go on trips with the kids instead?
If you don't vacation without the kids is it because you don't have a trusted babysitting source? Do you think you would take the time to get out of town without the kiddos more often if you did? If that's not your reason, what is it?
Do you think it's important for adult relationships, friendships and marriages, to get away without the kids?
I think time away, time to ourselves, is a necessary part of keeping good mental health. We should be setting time aside to de-stress, have fun, and relax. In addition, healthy adult relationships require effort and time. Sometimes parents really just need to get away for a bit and be with each other or at least other adults. I think vacations without the kid/s is a good thing. Now, that also depends on the age/s. I wouldn't have left my newborn for a vacation, but she is now an eight year old who is good to go to her grandma's while we focus on not focusing. We usually try to plan two mini vacations, one with her and one without her every now and then, so she doesn't feel left out.
We have left the kids with their grandparents many times. Now that the kids are older, we do it less often, as they are easier to travel with (and the grandparents aren't as young as they used to be).
It makes me nervous to think about leaving them, but once we are at our destination, I usually feel OK. Places that are far (foreign countries) or dangerous make me even more nervous...but we usually just do a quick 3 day trip somewhere in the US.
I never get time away from my kids, so I think it is healthy for me to do it once in a while. It's not as important to me as it used to be and it is quite the process (getting the kids to grandmas, packing for everyone, logistics, etc). We aren't able to do it as often as we used to, and I'm OK with that.
This year is our 15 yr anniversary, so perhaps we will have to plan something!
I say YES! we need time to unwind, spend time alone or with our SO and just de-stress, let loose and put responsibilities aside for a few days. Mine are little where it turns into more of a hassle to take them for anything other than a "daycation" with the change in scenery, new beds, etc. We just did this and its more stress for me and my SO. They were fine as long as we weren't in the hotel room. But get a trusted family member to watch them and go do your thing for a few days. Last year we went on a cruise, just the two of us and it was awesome! When my kids are older, we'll plan something with and without them.
I think it's important to have some couple time to recharge and bond as adults. My husband and I take one long (or short) weekend a year to go to the beach by ourselves, leaving the kids with my parents. Otherwise, we pepper a few "date nights" here and there, and there's always bedtime.
That weekend away isn't always financially feasible (it hasn't been for us some years), but as the article pointed out, it's not exactly the kiss of death :) Different family dynamics abound, and I think good marriages and good parenting take many forms.
My husband and I went to Europe this year without the kids. It was great to get away and enjoy some couple time alone. It is hard since we have no family close by to easily watch the kids so normally they come with us on vacations.